Oh Riley! Factor

This post is dedicated to my newest/exceptional nephew Riley Thomas Forston. This little guy was born last week on February 13th. Usually, the number 13 proves to be unlucky, but already in his first week Riley has proved that superstition WRONG.

The following are reasons and or indications of how advanced Riley is:

1) He weighed 8 lbs. 9 oz. Some babies have to be 2 weeks old before they reach that fighting weight.

2) His soft spot is almost non-existent. I do not exaggerate when I say that this one-week-old infant's soft area of the cranium is only about the size of a quarter. (Yep!) He's hard headed, but in a good way.

3) He holds in his own pacifer. I've met babies who are a year old and cannot say the same. His expression seems to give off a signal of, "Don't worry about it mom, I've got it."

4) He's a sleepy head. 4 out of the last 8 days (half his life), little Riley has slept 5 hours straight during the night. I consider that sleeping through the night.

5) He chills. This kid has the maturity of the Dalai Lama. When it's time to be awake that's just what he is. No need to cry and be a nusance. Riley just takes it all in and quietly passes judgment on the world around.

6) His chakras are alligned. He is a true yoga master! I have seen him in postures that take advanced yoga students years to master. He basically hangs out in downward dog most of the time. He's an inspiration.

7) He's cool. How many babies do you know who sport sunglasses?

8) He's darn cute. This isn't technically an advancement, since you have to be born with good looks. But, needless to say, he will avoid the pitfalls of both Bruce Jenner and Kenny Rogers. No need for surgical enhancement.

9) He's much much more. I'm sure there are many more yet to be discovered, so let's just say, he's advanced times infinity. Yeah that should take care of it.

Why am I so lucky?

What a miracle? Truly I am being blessed for some kind of behavior that I am not fully aware of at the moment. This real-life phenomenon occured on Saturday while snowboarding with my sister Kym (gorgeous). Every time I go boarding I have to juggle my time between all those that want to spend the day hitting the slopes with me. Thus, a cell phone is imperative.

I should also rewind this story to the fact that while I was lacing up my boots in the parking lot, a well dressed couple approached me with a free lift pass. They were on there way out of town and couldn't use it, and I seem to fit the profile of someone they wanted to bestoy this friendliness upon. Ta duh, more free stuff. Why am I so lucky?

So, while riding the lift to a particularly difficult side of the mountain, I decided to send a text to one of those friends wanting to share my time. Uh oh, when I reached to put the phone in my pocket, it slipped from my hands and plummeted to the ground. There wasn't anything I could do about it at the moment. After the 15 minute lift ride came to an end, my sister and I had no choice but to haul down the mountain across several double-black diamonds in search of the lost and most likely, frozen phone.

I couldn't hope to find the phone in tact, I mean that only happens in movies. Right? Well, to my astonishment, there lay, buried in the snow, was my lost phone. Now, there was no chance this phone would still work, it had been laying there for 20 minutes in frozen water. But, again, another testimony of my Midas touch, the phone flipped open to show it was in perfect working order. Ah! Man, another grreat day.

Fatter Jack

What a beast! In a moment of indulgence I let myself eat some old-school, baseball stadium Cracker Jacks. Normally, I avoid all kinds of processed sugar and high calorie snacks. Since I plan on living to 110 like my Smucker's counterparts, I have to be this disciplined. But, as the day has worn on, the hunger monster got the better of me, and I slipped. Big time. Check this out, one snack-sized bag of these sweet little devils contains the following:

Calories: 150

Total fat: 2.5 g (YIKES!)

Cholesterol: O mg (phew.)

Sugars: 19 g (get the revolver.)

Anyway, I've done 500 ab flexes to try and counteract the effects. We'll see. I might have to eliminate my allocated 14 red grape evening snack. I hope not, I look forward to this.

Anyway, I feel enormous at the moment, but I'm sure this will pass by morning. When I sleep, I think I tend to burn more calories than when I'm awake. Thanks mom for great genes!

Great pics.

I own this, yep.

I've always enjoyed exotic vacation spots.

Just one of my 14 beautiful nieces and nephews.

Outdoorsy and modest.

Exceptional hair day.

I have tons of friends who adore me.

I can't help but be the center of attention.

On top of everything, I snowboard.

A funny thing happened . . .

This morning I awoke a half an hour after my alarm beeped. This was really no big deal, since I only take about twenty minutes to get ready. Not many girls can say that. In fact, I have found that my slightly thin hair has been a real blessing ever since I started blow-drying it in the 7th grade. After a slimming breakfast of Slim-fast Optima, I got in my car where I turned on my free Ipod Nano to listen to a playlist which I created. Some people pay for these kinds of gadgets, I don't. I arrived at school in a record 11 minutes without a ticket, even though I sped the whole way. No surprise.

While at school, I taught a meaningful lesson about the Holocaust. I mean, I really had these 15-year-olds near tears. It wouldn't be the first time I engaged students both intellectually and emotionally through my impressive presentation style. I always get top marks any time I am evaluated by an administrator. Now I am sitting through parent-teacher conferences, trying to stay humble as parent after parent compliments my teaching and understanding of their child. A girl just related a story in which she left my classroom and exclaimed to her friend, "Man, she's an awesome teacher." Ah shucks.

Well that's where I leave you for now, but I expect the rest of the day will go as well or better than the first half. Please feel free to comment on your favorite part of this post.