See ya suckers!

By "ya" I mean single life. Usually, when a young lady gets engaged, it is appropriate to remain humble and grateful, while not bragging or being boastful. . . well, I'm not that kind of girl. Please note the title of this blog. I fully plan on being atrocious.

As I prepare for the final countdown of singlehood, let me state that my life is probably better than yours. Feel free to judge me, hate me, be jealous of me, or despise my existence, because it doesn't change the fact that I have tricked Dale into marrying me on December 28th.

Things I am looking forward to as a newly engaged woman:

1. My precocious smirk when people talk about how amazing my ring is.

2. Telling future brides that they just have to hire "so in so" to do the "whatever," because he is a GENIUS!

3. Being stressed about planning an event that you were never really sure would happen.

4. Using the word "fiance" nonchalantly to co-workers and Bank Tellers.

5. Saying the phrase, "You've got to kiss a few frogs before you meet your Prince."

6. Smiling with my mouth closed and my head cocked slightly to the left.

7. Using the word AMAZING and AWESOME in more texts.

8. Getting into squabbles with my mom about which relatives should get invites.

9. Responding to questions about Dale with, "I'm marrying my best friend," and then doing number 6.

10. Feeling sorry for single girls because they haven't yet experienced true happiness.

The following are some obligatory photos that might cause you to skip the previous paragraphs of hillarity, but oh well.

(Contrast the proposal pictures with a photoshoot I did by myself earlier this year.)

Photobooth of Eternity

Who, me?

Where the magic happens.

Todd and Rachel: Co-conspirators of Operation Congratulation

Cover your eyes, Daddy Warbucks has adopted me.

Cassie was able to stop by for some "Wow Mom" photos.

Miracle of miracles!

Poor Dale is in for a lifetime of this